


The (Boys) Come Snappin' At Me

by klaineanummel



Category: Glee
Genre: Alternate Universe, Alternate Universe - Different First Meeting, M/M, kind-of-an-asshole!Kurt, waiter!Blaine
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2015-06-04
Updated: 2015-06-04
Packaged: 2018-04-02 21:08:48
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 2,259
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/4073944
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/klaineanummel/pseuds/klaineanummel
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Blaine’s a waiter at a restaurant and Kurt keeps snapping his fingers at him.</p>
            </blockquote>





	The (Boys) Come Snappin' At Me

**Author's Note:**

> Based on [ this post ](http://jaded-idealism.tumblr.com/post/120673803315/fic-where-blaines-a-waiter-at-a-restaurant-and) by jaded-idealism. Also for my klaine bingo prompt "pubs/bars" (it's kind of a stretch, but there's a bar at the restaurant so w/e). Hope you enjoy :D Title from "Magic" by B.O.B

He’s back.

Blaine tries to hide his frustration as Santana leads Him to Blaine’s section, wiggling her fingers in Blaine’s direction as she does. God, Blaine hates her. So much.

He makes his way over immediately, before Santana has even finished saying, “Your server will be right with you.” She turns to leave, grinning when she sees him standing right behind her. He grins back, then grins at the man sitting at the table.

“Hi, my name is Blaine, I’ll be your server today,” he says, just as he does every time.

Kurt rolls his eyes, “Why do you say that every time? I know who you are.”

“Company policy,” Blaine says, unblinking, “Can I start you off with a drink or would you like to wait for your partner to arrive?”

Kurt always comes in with a tiny brunette whose voice fills the entire restaurant. Blaine doesn’t think there’s been a single time she’s come in that Santana hasn’t threatened to strangle her. Then again, Blaine can’t really point fingers. He’s wanted to strangle Kurt a couple of times himself over the past couple of months.

“Just me today,” Kurt says, sliding the menu to the end of the table, “And I already know what I want. A glass of the house red and your biggest slice of cheesecake, thank you.”

Blaine continues to grin as he takes his menu, turns around, and immediately drops the grin and rolls his eyes. He’s been ordering the same thing for months now. Sometimes he orders white instead of red wine, but for the most part… Blaine should start sending his order back before he’s even seated.

He tells Elliott about the order and goes to pour the wine. Santana comes up to him and leans her arms on the bar, smirking, “You didn’t ID him this time.”

“What’s the point,” Blaine grumbles, “He just bitches at me about how ‘shouldn’t you know my age by now, I come in here all the time, you know you’d think you’d treat your regulars a little better’,” he rolls his eyes, “Why did you put him in my section?”

She shrugs, “Because he asked me to.”

Blaine frowns as a bell rings behind him and he turns to see Elliott’s already cut a rather large slice of cheesecake and is grinning at him from behind the partition between the kitchen and the bar.

“What?” Blaine asks as he places the plate and the glass on a tray.

“Oh, nothing. It’s just cute is all, how massive that guy’s crush on you is.”

Blaine scoffs, “Yeah, right. He treats me like shit.”

Elliott just smirks and turns back into the kitchen. Santana chuckles, then hurries off to the podium at the front of the restaurant as she sees a couple walk in. Blaine glares at both of them and starts to make his way back to Kurt’s table.

Kurt sees him and Blaine increases his pace, but it’s already too late. Kurt’s hand raises in the air and he snaps his fingers. Blaine grits his teeth and starts walking a little faster. Kurt raises an eyebrow when Blaine arrives at his table, looking entirely unimpressed.

“Here you go sir,” Blaine says, trying his damndest to sound polite, “House red and our largest slice of cheesecake.”

“I’ve actually changed my mind,” Kurt says, voice clipped, “I would prefer a glass of white today, and was trying to get your attention before you poured the red.”

He’ll kill him. He will literally kill him.

“Alright, I’ll just bring you a glass of white right away.”

He starts to walk away, and gets about two steps before he hears snapping fingers again. His back tenses and he slowly turns. Kurt is staring at him like he’s the biggest idiot on the planet.

“Yes, sir?”

“Please take this glass back,” he says, pushing the red wine closer to the edge of the table, “I don’t want to be charged for two glasses of wine when I only want one.”

“Right, of course. My apologies,” he takes the glass of red wine and power walks away, practically slamming it onto the bar when he gets there.

“He snapped his fingers at me,” he tells Santana who’s already back at the bar, “He’s been here for two minutes, he already has his order, and he still snapped his fingers at me.”

“Ah, it’s a ‘changed my mind’ night, huh?” she says as she watches Blaine pour a glass of white wine, “Okay, I’ll put as few other guests in your section as possible.”

That’s Santana code for ‘I’m sending every guest that comes in here your way’. Blaine groans and downs the glass of red that Kurt rejected. He knows he shouldn’t but, come one. Kurt’s been here for less than five minutes and he’s already being a pain. He can tell it’s going to be a long night.

He brings the glass of white to Kurt and sets it on the table, catching sight of Santana bringing a group of five his way. He hates her so much.

“Anything else for you, sir?” Blaine asks, teeth clenched. Kurt swirls the wine around his glass, sniffs it, then nods.

“No, that will be all, thank you.”

He knows that won’t be all, it’s never all, but he decides to take the reprieve for what it is and heads over to deal with some sane customers.

It’s exactly four minutes later, just as Blaine is setting the drinks down for his other table, that Kurt snaps his fingers again. Blaine winces, then smiles at the table of five and promises to be right back to take their order. He then turns to see Kurt holding his fork out, nose wrinkled.

Blaine takes a deep breath and heads over, “Yes, sir?”

“There’s a hair in my cheesecake,” Kurt says, holding the fork up to Blaine’s face. There is, in fact, a hair in it. A short, chestnut brown hair.

Blaine can’t help it. He says, “Our chef has black hair, sir.”

Kurt’s jaw drops, “Excuse me?” he shrieks, “What are you implying?”

Blaine’s eyes shut tightly and he silently beg whatever deity is listening to give him strength, “I am not implying anything sir,” Blaine says, voice tight, “I am simply pointing out that the only people who have been in contact with this cheesecake are myself, our chef Elliott, and you, and Elliott and I both have black hair.”

“Are you saying that I put this hair in here purposefully?” Kurt asks, voice reaching ear splitting levels.

“Not at all,” he knows that’s exactly what happened, “I am merely suggesting that perhaps a piece of your own hair fell into the cheesecake, that is all.”

Kurt glares, “Please bring me a new slice,” he says, pushing the cheesecake away from himself, “And your manager, if you would?”

Blaine takes the cheesecake and mutters curses aimed at Kurt the entire walk between Kurt’s table and the bar. He slaps the plate on the partition and says, “Hey, El, give me another slice of cheesecake. Apparently one of your light brown hairs fell into it and disgusted Mr. Nothing Is Ever Right.”

Elliott frowns, “But I don’t have-“

“I know that,” Blaine snaps, “I know-“ he runs a hand over his face, “Can you please just get me another piece of cheesecake fast? I’m contemplating murder, and orange just isn’t a good color for me.”

“Ooh, is your favorite customer back?” Tina trills behind him, and Blaine practically sags in relief.

“Oh thank god you’re here,” he says, “Kurt wants to talk to you.”

Tina’s eyebrows shoot up, “Wait, seriously?” she glances over to where Kurt is watching them, eyes narrowed dangerously, “He’s never asked to speak to a manager before.”

“That’s because I’ve never called him on his bullshit before.”

Tina’s eyes widen in understanding, “You know, Blaine,” she says, “As your friend I want to encourage you to spit in this guy’s cheesecake. You know I do,” Blaine chuckles, “But as your manager I have to remind you that the customer is always right. Even if they’re appallingly wrong, they’re always right.”

“Yeah, I know,” Blaine says, “It’s just… this guy. He just gets under my skin.”

“Probably because he’s so dreamy,” Santana says, approaching them with a smirk on her face, “I put another family in your section.”

“Shit,” Blaine says as Elliott rings the little bell, “I have to go take those people’s order. Tina, can you please give this to Kurt and just… I don’t know, deal with him? Preferably by banning him from the restaurant?”

Tina rolls her eyes and takes the plate of cheesecake, she and Blaine heading back to Blaine’s section together. Blaine heads in the direction of the group of five while Tina makes a beeline for Kurt.

As Blaine takes the guest’s order he keeps glancing toward where Kurt and Tina are talking. The first few times he glances over Kurt looks beyond angry. Then his cheeks turn bright red and he hangs his head. Blaine feels his heartbeat speed up in excitement at this amazing turn of events.

He takes the menus from the group of five, then heads over to the family who were just seated, smiling at taking their drink orders. He glances back over at Kurt and Tina again and finds Tina giggling as Kurt whispers something frantically at her, cheeks still bright red. Blaine’s brow furrows as he takes the menu’s over to the front podium, then continues frowning as he heads back to the bar where Santana is fiddling with her phone.

“Is Tina friends with Kurt?” he asks, beginning to pour the drinks for the family.

Santana hums in acknowledgment, “I think they went to high school together.”

“What?!” Blaine turns back to where Kurt and Tina are still talking, “Why didn’t anybody tell me?” he whispers frantically, “I’ve complained about him to her more than once!”

“She doesn’t mind,” Santana says, “She can acknowledge that Kurt is an asshole to wait staff.”

“Oh, so this is a thing, then? It’s not just me, he’s like this with every waiter?”

Santana shakes her head, “Probably not. He’s probably worse with you because of that big fat crush he’s got on you.”

“He does _not_ ,” Blaine says, cheeks heating up.

“Uh, yeah, he obviously does.”

Blaine shakes his head, piles the drinks on his tray and takes them to the family. He takes their order as well, gives them a friendly smile, and starts heading back to the bar to give Elliott the orders.

He’s stopped when he hears a finger snap, then a quiet, “Shit,” and a cleared throat, “Excuse me?”

Blaine turns, pasting a smile on his face, “Yes, sir?”

“Um,” Kurt rubs the back of his neck, “So, apparently I’m an asshole?”

Blaine snorts and Kurt blushes.

“I swear I don’t mean to be,” he continues, “I just don’t… I’ve never really been good at talking to cute guys, because I always sort of ramble on and on, kind of like I’m doing now,” he ducks his head, “The point is that I’ve been horrible to you because I didn’t know how to talk to you, and that’s inexcusable and I’m sorry.”

Blaine feels the corner of his lips turn up and he has to force it back down. This man has been making his life miserable for _months_ he is not going to just let him off the hook because he looks endearing as hell when apologizing.

“I’d love to make it up to you,” Kurt continues, looking up shyly, “Show you that I’m not as big of an asshole as I’ve made you believe over the past few months?”

Blaine purses his lips, “Why would I say yes? You’ve… kind of made work a living hell for the past few months.”

Kurt drops his face in his hands, “God, I know. I _know_ , okay? Rachel’s been yelling at me since January about how horrible I am to you and ‘this isn’t kindergarten Kurt, you can’t pull his hair and expect him to know it means you like him’.”

Blaine snorts, “I always thought that was sort of a messed up societal norm.”

“Yeah,” Kurt nods, “It is. I’m sorry.” He takes a deep breath and says, “Look, if you don’t want to go out with me I’ll get out of your way, okay? I won’t come back here, I won’t bother you again. I’m not that big of an asshole that I don’t understand the word ‘no’.”

“Well, that bodes well for me,” Blaine says, chewing on his bottom lip in deliberation. “Fine, what the hell.”

Kurt’s eyes become as big as saucers, “Wait, what?”

“Yeah, sure, I’ll go out with you,” Blaine shrugs, “You said you’re not really an asshole, right?” Kurt nods immediately, hair flopping a little atop his head as he does, “Well, I’d like to get to know the non-asshole you. Just promise me you won’t snap your fingers at the waiter when we go out, okay?”

Kurt grins, “Deal,” he says, taking out a napkin and scribbling his number on it, “Here’s my number. Call me, okay?” He slaps a twenty on the table and scurries out of the restaurant, pausing as he pushes the front door open to shyly wave goodbye. Blaine waves back, tucks the twenty into his apron and heads back to the bar where Tina and Santana are smirking at him.

He rolls his eyes but grins as he says, “Oh, shut up.”

 

**Author's Note:**

> [ rebloggable on tumblr ](http://klaineanummel.tumblr.com/post/120703094585/the-boys-come-snappin-at-me)


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